5 Simple Ways to Survive in the OR

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1. Smile with your eyes
This is the most important thing you can do in the OR.

Your hair is covered with your bouffant cap and your mouth and cheeks are covered with a mask. How will people know your extreme interest with so much of your face covered? Just SMILE with your EYES. My mouth stays mostly stationary, but my eyes take on a life of their own. They squint, they smile, they enlarge, they react and they ENGAGE. Did I think the scrub tech's joke was funny? Hell no. But did my eyes think the joke was funny? Yes and they spent at least 60 seconds exploding with laughter.

2. Glove with confidence and flair

The more confidently you put on your glove, the less likely it is that two of your fingers will accidently go into one finger hole.

A little flair with your hand movements while gloving distracts everyone from all the times you accidently get your finger caught on your sleeve causing your finger to bend which therefore fails to make it into the finger hole. No one will even notice!

3. Know your audience 

The scrub tech with tats and a crude sense of humor. I throw out beaver jokes like it’s my job, laugh hard at her “that’s what she said jokes” and reference my favorite local tattoo parlor (I didn’t even know I had one).

The male nurse from Latin America? Easy. Let a small, barely perceptible blonde lock poke through the side of my Bouffant cap. Winks don’t hurt either.

How about the attending who plays guitar on the weekends? “Sir, your choice of OR music is impeccable.”

Compliment everyone on their original and unique Dansko selection.

“Mary, I just love your Danskos.”

“Tiff- I’ve never seen such cute Danskos. You’re rockin’ them.”

4. Thank the Scrub Tech for Being Crabby

-“Liz, you need to stand straight on or you’ll ruin the sterile field and we’ll have to start this whole surgery over. Pay attention”

-Me: “Oh my! Thank you!” [Smile with eyes]

-“Drop your hand another inch and you’ll have contaminated the field possibly giving this patient an infection where they’ll die slowly, painful, experience multiple amputations, spread the infection to their young child and then bleed out from their orifices.”

-Me: “Oh! Thank you for watching out for me!” [Smile with eyes]

5. Realize that they’ll give you insignificant jobs, which you’ll be sure to mess up.

One job I often do is cut ties with the scissors. My success rate for this simple job is approximately 50%. I’ve gotten fired from “cutting” over 5 times. I thought I mastered the art of cutting in kindergarten, but apparently not. Here are just a smattering of the 100s of corrections I’ve received.

“Oops Liz, cut that one too short!”

“Leave more of a tail next time”

“Next time, put your hand down on the sterile field to more effectively cut.”

“Be more careful you don’t cut the knot.”

“You can cut more quickly.”

“Ou, next time, take your time. It’s more important to be accurate than quick.”  

“You should angle your scissors more precisely next time”

“Now stabilize that scissors with your index finger.”

Now I just realize that I’ll mess up whatever job I’m given. With the bar of expectations set only inches from the ground, my failures feel like neutrality, and my infrequent cutting successes make me feel like I can conquer the world.